Most of us are captured in shackles of our mind that we have given up our control over, given the power away to other people, circumstances and outer influences. We have allowed the world outside of us to dictate who we are and alter our lives. It is time to break the shackles, break free from the mental cage of living small and fearful lives, allowing ourselves to become a martyr for everyone else. We have a right to cultivate a life that is so potent and so loud that disrespect feels foreign. We do not have to stay timid and insignificant for anyone's approval or acceptance.
Breaking free from these shackles is a journey of learning the art of being soft with boundaries of steel. There is a misconception that we have to be hard, tough and rigid to protect ourselves and never let anyone in but that is where many of us mess up and allow that to impact and shape our lives. We can be open and still have boundaries. The parts of us that are soft, vulnerable, feminine, sensitive, they are not weak as we have been taught, those parts of us are what makes us, us. That is the most beautiful part, that is where living happens, that is where feeling happens, that is where the joy of life comes from.
When we fall in love with ourselves and our lives so much, taking one step at a time, we learn that disrespect from other people is impossible to tolerate because when it is measured against the amount of love and respect we have for ourselves, it can't even be considered to alter our life in the smallest of ways. We have the ability, the power to treat ourselves better than anyone else could. With doing this, we still can maintain our boundaries, our strong hold of protection. That doesn't mean that we have to be vulnerable to the impact of actions, words or events, being a solid rock of a human, never feeling or letting anyone in, we can still be soft and full of love on the inside with a stronghold around us.
If we look at all our issues as an outside influence, that disempowers us more, telling ourselves that we do not have control over our lives. Discovering the reason a situation is or the way we are is because of a certain thing, it doesn't need to end there, we must seek to go beyond that surface level of discovery, we must seek to understand the reason, trauma or event that shaped that part of us. Then we must go even further and see how that outer structure has formed our inner structure of our mind, taking baby steps out of it to freedom. Giving ourselves permission to be soft and gentle, allowing ourselves to fall in love with who we are, not needing a wall of steel to keep everything and everyone out, constantly placing the blame elsewhere.
It is not empowering to constantly point the finger outside of your life because it puts you in a state of helplessness and you forget that you have control. Part of the issue is we tend to wait for someone to save us because we think we have no control over the outcome of where we are going. There is no reason to wait for someone, some event, success or achievement to have influence and power over the way we feel about our life. We can make our life beautiful from the inside out, then that can reflect back to us, giving us more of what we feel, love and happiness.
There will be moments of feeling insecure and moments of worry or doubt but we have the tools to get us out if it. We will not always be in a constant state of joy, that is impossible but we can find the things that work for us to pull us out. We can make a move on our lives and not just sit around waiting for something to change, we have to make that change. If we continue to wait for things to change, feeling no sense of control, that can lead to worsening anxiety or depression in moments of our lives because we forget that we have a say in our life.
Taking back that control of our life and unshackling ourselves can be something so small and simple. It is not the thing that you are doing, it is what the thing represents to you. For example, if it's just getting out of bed on a hard day, brushing your hair, decorating yourself with clothes or jewelry, if that makes you feel good, makes you happy, that is taking control. You took your power back, rather than letting your situation, anxiety, or depression lead you by keeping you where you are, you chose to get up, to take a small step to making yourself feel important to you. That is taking lead in your life, empowering yourself to push on, one day at a time, one thing at a time.
Another example is incorporating things in your life that bring you joy, if it’s a color, bring more of that into your home, everywhere, that unconsciously makes your proud because you created an environment to delight you and bring you joy. The way out of feeling helpless is through these small changes, these small tiny steps.
We must acknowledge all the external barriers we have that we have allowed to be built and the ways they have formed and shaped our minds, solidified as beliefs, the way we have internalized these beliefs and how it leads our actions. Don't disempower yourself thinking you have no control over your day or your life. We can move out of a life of just surviving and into a life of thriving.
Break the shackles, free yourself from the way you think you should be to protect yourself. You can lay those chains down and walk away with love for who you are and your life and no one or situation can change that love you have for you. Sending you all my love and light to help loosen the shackles in hopes you find the courage to take back your power and control to shatter them.
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