Comforting the person we are now

Today I wanted to talk with you about comforting the person we are now. What I mean by this is that the person we are now has been through tremendous amount of growth pains and devastating loss. To become the person we are now we had to encounter triggering memories, getting over guilt, letting go, and acceptance of what is. All these things can be extremely hard and heart wrenching. 

When we are on our healing journey we are faced with all these forms of darkness within ourselves. It can become a heavy weight that we carry in our hearts. But we don't have to carry them around with us for longer than needed. We can go through these emotions of pain, hurt, fear and guilt but it's important to remember that we have the ability to comfort those emotions, those parts of ourselves to make the healing process a little lighter, a little easier.  

Through comforting ourselves, we are giving ourselves permission to feel these emotions fully, permission to accept what they have brought up in us and permission to be grateful for what they have taught us. You are able to go through all of this, including letting them go with love and patience. If we begin to resist these emotions, we run the risk of them becoming imbedded in our heart and soul and have them pop up later down the road with a stronger intent to weigh us down even more than before. 

I have discovered that when these emotions arise, it is important to sit with them, feel them, observe them, learn from them and then let them go. At times, we will feel overwhelmed and in that moment unable to deal with those emotions and that is ok, just tell those emotions that you will deal with them later. Letting your emotional self know that you will deal with them later allows you time to gather yourself and prepare yourself to face them, rather that telling those emotions that they do not belong there or ignoring them, that leads to those unwanted emotions making home in your heart, only to rear their ugly head later. Telling these emotions that you will deal with them later, it's like putting them in a file cabinet that you will come back to later that day or the following day to take time to work with them and through them. This way you are not letting them take root, you are just storing those seeds in a folder, not in the soil of your mind and heart. 

There is a meditation practice that I have learned to cultivate into my daily routine when these heavy emotions rear their heads up. When I feel an emotion come up from an event that is occurring in the present moment, such as fear, anxiety, and doubt, if I am able in that moment, I will close my eyes and focus on my breath, I then begin to envision in my mind's eye three different shapes of me. One person is anxiety, another person is fear, and another person is doubt. I see them all standing there looking at me with their own emotions displayed on their faces. I go to each one, taking my time needed for each emotion, giving them comfort, telling them that it is ok that they are here and feel the way they do, that I thank them for their protection. One by one I do the same process of comforting them and thanking them. In thanking them, I am able to free them and release that emotion within me. 

There are moments when these emotions arise and I do not have the time right in that moment to close my eyes and do this practice, when that happens, I steady my breath and say to myself that it is okay, I am safe, I love you fear, anxiety, and doubt, I thank you for trying to protect me. With my eyes open, I still take a few moments to acknowledge these emotions and allow them to be seen and felt in order to let them go. 

Taking these moments to be there for yourself when these emotions come up is very important for the process of letting them go and not holding on to them and allowing them to grow stronger. It can be hard at times when some of these emotions can be so strong and hard to let go of. But if we continually visit these individual emotions and be there for them, assuring them that they are safe and accepting the way that they feel, it can become easier to let them go. Over time, the more you practice this, it will get easier and you will feel lighter. 

There is great value in comforting ourselves because we are always here with ourselves. These emotions can't be comforted or relieved by anyone else but you. Others may distract or subside the weight of these emotions but they are still there, lingering in the background. It is not healthy for us mentally to continually ignore or push away these emotions. If we do not take time to sit with them and be aware of them, they can become rooted in our heart, spreading toxins and decay in our spirit, causing us to become a reflection of these emotions. Doing so, we let them take charge of who we are.  

Take time to be there for yourself and comfort these emotions. Remember that you are so strong and you have all the power within yourself to sit with them, see them, accept the, thank them, and to let them go. You do not have to be weighed down and be led by emotions that are not for your higher good. You can take all the time you need to sit with them, whether it be a minute, 30 minutes, or setting them aside in a separate part of you to visit tomorrow. There are no rules and no rush to this process, the important thing is that you take the time you need to be there for you, to comfort you and accept you.  

I am sending you so much love and light to these parts of yourself in hopes that you turn inward and sit with those heavy emotions and comfort them in order to let them go.