The most peaceful people and the most wise people are the ones who have created enough internal space to be able to allow all the parts of themselves to coexist despite the contradictions. They have room for their creativity, their fear, their dignity, their shame, they have room for the parts of themselves that are glorious, divine and wonderful, they have room for the parts of themselves that are petty, jealous and ridiculous. They create this huge landscape inside themselves, not kicking any part of themselves out because ultimately they cant.
Cultivating a peaceful life starts there, making space and allowing all parts of you a room within your being. Peace comes when we accept the light and the dark in us. When we learn to give space and accept each part of who we are despite whether we like that part or think it is essential to who we are, we are able to allow ourselves to be at peace.
When we are at war with ourselves or certain aspects of who we are, whether that be something brought on by past experience, trauma or by choice in order to protect ourselves, there is conflict, there is a battle going on inside of negative self-talk, self-hatred, self-doubt. These can cause a storm in our spirit to be brewing. Some days that storm within ourselves can be a light rain, other days it can be a hurricane. Peace comes when there is acceptance.
When we accept that a parts of who we are is just that, a part of us, we are able to show love, grace, and forgiveness, therefore bringing peace in our life. This applies with our choices as well, feeling regret or anger toward ourselves for a decision we made, peace cannot abound in the presence of these emotions. There is turmoil and conflict occurring, there is no space for peace there. When we have these times or moments in our lives where we are feeling guilt, regret, anger, or confused, that is ok, we are allowed to have these emotions but when we dwell on them, constantly reflect on them or steady wish we did things different, peace can't be found because we are choosing to live in the past.
This applies with past events that may have hurt us, such as being hurt in the past by a partner, we may have a lot of regret for tolerating things, staying as long as we did, or for being too naive and caring to be able to leave. Going over moments in our head, thinking of things we should have done or things we should have said, during those moments there is something going on in our body, anxiety, anger, fear, doubt, and many more, those can latch themselves onto you if you are not careful.
It is completely okay and normal to think back on the past, the things we did or didn't do, the choices we made, the things we allowed. It can be essential in healing to revisit those emotions in order to see where we went wrong and where to set boundaries with ourselves and others. The issue is when we dwell on those things from the past and allow them to become part of the present. For example, if we are feeling guilt for not pursuing a career for whatever reason and we frequently think back to the choice that didn't lead to that career, that can bring us down, we begin to doubt our life in the present and if it is good enough or would it be better.
When we allow these emotions from the past to be such a part of our present, we forget to be grateful and fully experience the now. We can have these feelings but not allow them to fester and affect today, that is how we live peacefully. Accepting the past, the choices we made, and the choices we didn't make, then seeing that it is ok, we are here now, we are alive, we are grateful for lessons taught and learned, experiences for growth, that gives space for peace to be present.
It can be hard to accept things from the past and I won't lie, they can continue to appear in your mind and bring you back, but it's important to come back to the now and realize that everything that has happened has brought you to this point, shaped who you are and taught you so much about yourself. When we are able to stop and see that, we are giving ourselves an opportunity, a chance to change our life.
We all have parts of ourselves that we don't like or we wish were different but if we want to live in peace, we have to begin to love those darker parts too. We won't always be able to dwell in the light of ourselves, there will be times we need to spend time with the dark, to show compassion and gratitude. By doing this, it doesn't mean we have to repeat the past and make the same choices or condone behavior we ourselves did or behavior of others, it means that we are using those things as a tool to help build a stronger self-respect in order to have peace.
When we accept each part of who we are with love, understanding and patience, we are able to cultivate a peace within that spills over into our lives. You don’t have to speak of peace, you just feel it, embrace it, by being peaceful with ourselves, the universe, the ocean, the waters, the earth, that is all the medicine we need. That is not just for us, it is for the plants, the animals, the insects, the birds, everything deserves peace.
You deserve to live a peaceful life, you deserve to be happy with who you are and where you are right now. Being alive right now is huge and that deserves gratitude. Sending you all my love and light that you find peace today.
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